Who ordered the scrambled brains?

Wow, it’s 2006! It’s been so for a few weeks now but it still feels quite fresh, no? Although I intend eventually to write a full assessment of the kick-ass year that 2005 was (I call it Mike’s 2005 Kick Assessment), I have neither the time nor desire to actually do so. Immediately in it’s place, therefore is this post, with the slightly less bombastic title, Get your SB fix, in 2006! (Pronounced too-tau-sen seis.)

This post will be about a great many things, both grand and miniscule, so I urge caution unto readers of soft hearts, and softer heads.

First, here’s a great article for spicing up your daily prose. Take, for example, the potent rhetoric wielded in the following.

Sandwich Monkies:hey
Sandwich Monkies:at work?
lunalot:yes.
lunalot:and thee?
lunalot:art thou at work?
lunalot:or at a jousting tournament?
Sandwich Monkies:i’m in my classroom
Sandwich Monkies:using those comps locked in a dentist chair up front
Sandwich Monkies:*lanced through the head*
Sandwich Monkies:*dies*
lunalot:hahahah
lunalot:ah, jousting school
lunalot:*uprorious laughter from audience*
lunalot:i guess that lesson went straight to his head
Sandwich Monkies:*audience from 15th century*
lunalot:*audience is worked into a frenzy*
Sandwich Monkies:lolol
Sandwich Monkies:nice
lunalot:he’s probably in serious agony!
lunalot:*audience revolts*
Sandwich Monkies:"he sure got the point of that lesson!"
lunalot:hahahaha
lunalot:that’s a way to get aHEAD of the other students
Sandwich Monkies:"that lesson went in one ear, and out the other"
lunalot:and that’s why you shouldn’t have an authentic
knight from the 12th century pierce your ears, modern day children.
lunalot:lololol!
lunalot:is this jousting school, or head shish kebab school?!
Sandwich Monkies:jousting school
Sandwich Monkies:…
Sandwich Monkies:*cough*
lunalot:ok
lunalot:i must be in the wrong classroom.
lunalot:haha

[Three minute silence.]

Sandwich Monkies:alright i better log off, students are drifting in
lunalot:k later

See? By merely starting off with a little spice, I turned a normally routine, tedious conversation into a real winner. You can take that to the bank! And while you’re there, why don’t you check into cash if you can.

Second, this year I will start a new and unique feature called “Product Reviews” soon. I don’t want to really reveal the details, as it’s a surprise, but suffice it to say the first couple entries will involve Tom’s of Maine Anticavity Toothpase and Deodorant, and the book Agile Web Development with Rails.

Third, I thought I’d … Crap, I forgot what third was. But it was good, and when my brain coughs it up, I’ll update this post.

Wait, I think third was just a mini-assessment of 2005, and pre-assessment of 2006. 2005:

• Finished all significant requirements for degree (’cept Spanish as ya’ll should know)
• Survived, by borrowing money from everyone (corporate legal entities included) possible. Thank you all.
• Received an unofficial job offer.
• Natalie got her driver’s license.

And 2006:

• Finish el español and get B.A. Wow!
• Start full-time programming job, make (big?) bucks! Wow!
• Start repaying my liabilities! Phew!
• Get in shape! Pant!
• Finally have a life! Awoooga!

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